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The sunny side of grief

Grief is a mystical grandmother.
A stormy ocean who’s waves are smashing the shores of our human nature and its dreams. She is the witch who’s appearance is ugly and secretly holds the most innocent beauty for the innocent eyes. She is fierce and she whispers wisdom into our ears. Her embrace incinerates our heart and in this fire, a doorway to the one Heart is being offered. How challenging it is for a dancer of life to perform such split in its full brutality can only be understood from experience.

Unfortunately, there is a tendency in the spiritual community to highlight the blessings and goals of loss into the face of a mourner. To use spiritual experience and understanding to outsmart another human being who is deeply in a process of grief is a sign of immature spirituality and just one more smart layer of identity. The good advices and pointers of spiritual seekers that glorify the little they have found on the back of these who stand in this very vulnerable place are but a sad reflection of their boasting ignorance.

The one in loss knows about grief’s inherent blessings more than anyone. It is the sacred ground on which he stands. He doesn’t need reminders. Only silent honor can meet his challenge. And it is in Grace’s hands how much of this gift he can bear. It takes tremendous strength to stand naked in such duality, only dressed with Faith. To have grieved yourself and feel deeply for the broken hearts of others, always remembering that we don’t have the full picture of their experience is a humble and genuine act of a mature heart.

Hold back spiritual community hold back when someone is in grief. The mature Companion shares the field of not knowing.

To use sorrow as the initiation, the sacred step into the light of divine recognition is a razor blade. May we have quiet thoughts and humble hearts for these who are about to try the impossible leap and support them with our silence. Shall we not fall for the pop culture spirituality that points at these who carry real loads with a mouth full of sunny fast-food wisdom. Let us respect that grandmother.

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